Kafkaesque?
I was at my home in Delhi playing some game with my two cousins . We went to bed after that. Now everything changes from bright to dark, like the light went out suddenly. I wake up, as in I sleepily open my eyes, and I find I am lying down in the backseat of a car, I think an Indigo, on a comfy chair with arm rests, facing a side window. A man is driving the car and I am not able to see his face. I am confused; how I ended up in this car? I try to remember but then I realize its a dream. I wanted to wake up now because I didn't like where the dream was heading, dark night, desolated road, a stranger driving a car. So I close my eyes and try to actually wake up. I am back in my home in Delhi, getting up from the bed. I am little relieved, but then, where was everybody? Again I find something is amiss. It was quite dark and I was somehow almost simultaneously in my bedroom and drawing room. So I think, 'shit'. I realized it was still a dream. One odd thing, I was wearing a skull locket chain all the time, so it would come in the frame from time to time and freak me out. I close my eyes again and try to open my eyes carefully, focusing that I do it physically this time. I opened, and I was again in the car on the dark road. I try to look around, try to get up, but only manage a little movement. The guy driving the car, starts to turn around slowly that I shut my eyes close so hard out of fear. I didn't see his face. I was getting desperate now. I again tried to wake up, but would ultimately either end up in my home, or in the car... and this happened a few times. I was getting more and more conscious each minute and felt more and more helpless by it.
The real problem was that in my dream I had forgotten that in reality I was not in Delhi, but in Pune. I tried so hard, mind you, with my conscious mind, to remember that where I had been last, where had I fallen asleep. I tried to feel the texture with my hands where I was lying down but didn't get anything. Couldn't think beyond the time when I was playing with my cousins. But somehow I concluded, I could only be at my home in Delhi because I am not one of the 'party people' and would usually spend my night at home. So when I woke up again in my home, I thought I will try to call "mummy". So I shout "mummy" not very loudly, because I don't want to freak them out(in the real world). Now was I able to successfully produce a voice in real world, I didn't know. There was no response. I try again, this time deep from the throat, "Mumma". A concerned voice came from the other room, "haan beta". Now I was relieved, because she will come (in the real world) and shake me and wake me up any instant. But nobody came. So I started searching the house, again, all in dark, calling, "bhai, papa, mummy" continuously. But there was no one. Sometimes a hand would come from behind or somewhere, which I couldn't recognize, so I tried to ignore it. And there would be someone standing in a dark corner but I tried to ignore them too. Now I was getting really desperate and frustrated, because I was now almost fully conscious. Now whenever I shouted, "mummy" I would realize actually I am not able to move my lips and would not utter any voice. After trying several times and failing every time, I gave up. Then a brilliant idea came to my mind. I thought I will try to roll over and try to fall over from the bed, that would surely wake me up. So I tried desperately. I felt it was working, and after few attempts, I fell, it didn't hurt, and I started to feel the coldness of the floor. But it didn't wake me up. I again started to think where I was last.
I don't really remember the instant when I realized that I was in Pune, or in fact, don't even know for sure that I realized it or not, because that was the instant when I woke up. Powered off laptop screen in front of me, on which I saw the reflection of the skull again, but I shook it off, no more delusions. Removed the big headphones from my ears. I was not drenched in sweat, but was a little soaked. I checked the time, it was 4.36 am and there is no way I am going to sleep again tonight.
The real problem was that in my dream I had forgotten that in reality I was not in Delhi, but in Pune. I tried so hard, mind you, with my conscious mind, to remember that where I had been last, where had I fallen asleep. I tried to feel the texture with my hands where I was lying down but didn't get anything. Couldn't think beyond the time when I was playing with my cousins. But somehow I concluded, I could only be at my home in Delhi because I am not one of the 'party people' and would usually spend my night at home. So when I woke up again in my home, I thought I will try to call "mummy". So I shout "mummy" not very loudly, because I don't want to freak them out(in the real world). Now was I able to successfully produce a voice in real world, I didn't know. There was no response. I try again, this time deep from the throat, "Mumma". A concerned voice came from the other room, "haan beta". Now I was relieved, because she will come (in the real world) and shake me and wake me up any instant. But nobody came. So I started searching the house, again, all in dark, calling, "bhai, papa, mummy" continuously. But there was no one. Sometimes a hand would come from behind or somewhere, which I couldn't recognize, so I tried to ignore it. And there would be someone standing in a dark corner but I tried to ignore them too. Now I was getting really desperate and frustrated, because I was now almost fully conscious. Now whenever I shouted, "mummy" I would realize actually I am not able to move my lips and would not utter any voice. After trying several times and failing every time, I gave up. Then a brilliant idea came to my mind. I thought I will try to roll over and try to fall over from the bed, that would surely wake me up. So I tried desperately. I felt it was working, and after few attempts, I fell, it didn't hurt, and I started to feel the coldness of the floor. But it didn't wake me up. I again started to think where I was last.
I don't really remember the instant when I realized that I was in Pune, or in fact, don't even know for sure that I realized it or not, because that was the instant when I woke up. Powered off laptop screen in front of me, on which I saw the reflection of the skull again, but I shook it off, no more delusions. Removed the big headphones from my ears. I was not drenched in sweat, but was a little soaked. I checked the time, it was 4.36 am and there is no way I am going to sleep again tonight.
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